Minimizing Excess Weight Through Prayer & Fasting

"I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that ye present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable unto God, which is your reasonable service."

Romans 12:1 (emphasis added)

You may wonder why I am talking about weight loss issues on a blog called Biblical Minimalism.  I realize that this will not apply to many of you, and chances are, you have no weight to lose and/or have already overcame in this area of minimizing.  Even if obesity is not an issue for you, I hope you can bear with me.  Maybe the stuff we talk about here will apply to another area of excess in your life.  Or perhaps you are struggling with another type addiction, unrelated to food, and maybe the things God is teaching me will be beneficial to you for something totally different.  At any rate, I trust you won't give up on me, as I use this space to work through this journey.

I recently published this very raw, unedited, transparent post concerning my ongoing struggles with obesity.  From the number of private emails I have been getting from different readers I have never heard from before, it turns out there are far more of you who share in my struggles than I imagined.  My heart goes out to each on of you because no one else could ever understand or feel your pain more than I do right now.  I want you to know I am praying for you and believing alongside you for victory for every, single one of us.

In our new book and in this post, I talk about the Whole Person Pie©, how our lives are made up of eight "slices" and how God should be the center.

One of those eight "slices" is called "the physical," which, in my opinion, falls right next to "the spiritual" slice of the pie in order of importance.  The physical slice of the pie is broken down into two parts - physical possessions (which you can read about in this post),

and our physical bodies (which I talked about here.)  I say that the physical slice is right next to the spiritual in order of importance because, as Christians, our physical bodies are the temples of the Holy Spirit.  "What? know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own?"  I Corinthians 6:19

One of the parts of the "physical slice" that I focused on in that post is obesity.  

I'll be honest.  I hesitate to write about this at all because I am SO unqualified to talk about it.  Not that I am the authority on ANYthing I write about, but at least I can testify to the chain-breaking power of God and how He enabled us to sell our home and release about 90% of our physical possessions, liberated us from all our indebtedness, and performed so many other wonders in our lives.  Those are areas that I can see such blatant, visible proof as to what He has literally done, and my family and I have walked through those things and can see tanglible victory.  The gray slice you see in the pie chart above called "obesity" is a whole other ballgame.  This is where I am.  This is reality, and this is where I have gained zero victory and why I feel completely unqualified to share since I am still in the throes of this struggle and seeing no success.

When I stepped on the doctor's scale a few months ago and saw that glaring, shocking number staring me down, I could hardly believe it.  I told the nurse who stood next to me that I couldn't believe it.  Bless her heart, she struggles with the same and told me that after she steps on the scales and sees the number, she goes and gets something to eat and forgets about it!  I love her to pieces, but that is not exactly the most helpful medical advice I've ever been given, and it sure didn't encourage me to get this weight off.  When the doctor walked in, and I mentioned my weight gain to him and let him know how distressed I am about it, he began ordering testing, and sure enough, they found issues.  Those, piled on to the other physical conditions I have dealt with for years, in all fairness, are formidable opponents to my weight loss efforts.  Add medically-confirmed menopause to the mix, and you have a sure fire recipe for weight loss sabotage, and to be honest, this has all felt so hopeless.  I have felt completely trapped.

But, " Is any thing too hard for the LORD?"  Genesis 18:14 - this question was raised in reference to God's promise that Sarah would conceive and bear a son at the ripe old age of 90.  Can you imagine how incredulous and impossible this had to have sounded to Sarah?  I don't find it odd that she laughed when she heard that the following year, she would have a son. 

If God can open the barren womb of a 90-year-old woman and give her and her 100-year-old husband a son, can He not help me lose weight, in spite of medical limitations?  Their age was a mighty formidable opponent to childbirth, yet God miraculously fulfilled His promise to them and gave them a son of their own.  

My obesity is a stronghold that looks as impossible to me as having a child must have looked to Abraham and Sarah.  Yet, Jesus said, "With men this is impossible; but with God all things are possible."  Matthew 19:26  

2 Corinthians 10:4 says, "For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds."  Obesity, for me, is a strong hold.  It is a place in my life that I cannot seem to break through and change through any carnal weapon I have been able to get my hands on.  My many failed efforts in making this happen are living proof that I cannot do this—alone.  

But, God has been showing me that I CAN do this through His strength, and He is consistently bringing Matthew 17:21 to my mind, "Howbeit this kind goeth not out but by prayer and fasting."  Sometimes, prayer alone is not enough.  There are some strong holds that cannot be pulled down through any other means than the mighty weapon combo of prayer and fasting.  Fasting requires self-denial and discipline, and I think that is precisely what I need right now.

I mentioned in my last post that I have been reading Kalen Bruce's new book, "10 Branches of Growth," and how Kalen talks about the discipline of intermittent fasting.  I had heard of it, and Kevin, Zach, and I had even tried it for a short time quite a while ago, but I had forgotten about it.  Full disclosure- I am not a doctor, nor am I saying that intermittent fasting will work or even be healthy for everyone.  Please seek the Lord for wisdom, and know that I am only sharing this as my own experience and testimony.  

A few days ago, I started the disicpline of intermittent fasting from 7:00 PM until at least 11:00 AM.  By God's grace, it is my goal to exercise this discipline until it becomes a habit that continues until the excess weight is gone.  I am not making a vow, and I know that I am continually subject to fall off the wagon, but this is my goal.  

Here's the best part.  Through the years, during times that the Lord has called me to fast, I have always been so amazed at the level of intimacy and spiritual depths I am drawn into while fasting.  There is just a special closeness and communion with God that has happened every, single time.  When I began this intermittent fasting a few nights ago, that was the farthest thing from my mind.  My sole purpose in doing this, in the beginning, was to lose weight.  But, the other night it occured to me that I am feeling that amazing sense of closeness to Jesus during the hours of 7:00 PM - 11:00 AM!  This is not just helping me physically.  It is helping me spiritually.  I feel a drawing to steal away in the evenings and go up to our room and enter into extra prayer time.  I am feeling that sense of His presence that is so much more overwhelming than usual.  The sheer act of denying myself those guilty pleasures of snacking and unnecesary food consumption at night is working and producing something good in my soul.  This is a win/win!

As I felt led to write this post, I asked the Lord if it is really necessary for me to share my struggles.  After all, this isn't the easiest thing in the world.  I got an immediate answer and confirmation that He wants to use my intense struggles to help someone else.  I have surrendered my life to Him to use as He sees fit, I have handed the reins to Him, and my life is a living sacrifice.  If He can get any glory out of my issues and discrepancies, and if they can reach out and let someone else know they are not alone, then here I am Lord, send me.  

I deeply appreciate your continued prayers that I will stay strong and be faithful to God in bringing this area of my life under subjection to Him.  This slice of the pie is every bit as important as decluttering the house, giving away possessions, and getting out of debt - in fact, it is even more important than all that because as I said before, this has to do with the very temple in which God's Spirit dwells.  It is my "reasonable service" to do all I can to make it as healthy a dwelling place as I possibly can.  You are my accountability partners, and your prayers mean the world to me.  God bless you all and help you with whatever you may be struggling with today.

Weight Loss Confessions

"Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us."  Hebrews 12:1 (KJV)

Hebrews 12:1 has literally become our minimalism journey anthem.  The laying aside of every weight and besetting sin is our constant pursuit, and it is ever on my mind and foremost in my walk with the Lord.  With all my heart, I want to please Him and live out the plan He has ordained for my time on this earth, and I know I cannot do that successfully while weighted down with excess.

I think often of the analogy the Apostle Paul wrote about in 1 Corinthians 9:24.  "Know ye not that they which run in a race run all, but one receiveth the prize? So run, that ye may obtain."  Anyone knows that in order for a runner to run a race at optimal speed and efficiency, they have to cast off every ounce of unnecessary weight.  To think that a runner could win a race with heavy objects strapped to his/her back, let alone excess body weight, is absurd.

Photo by Aaron Burden

It is no secret that I have struggled much with physical weight issues for several years.  It is a constant source of distress for me, and I have tried so many things to lose the weight, only to fall off the wagon and end up gaining even more.  Can anyone relate?

This morning, as I spent time with the Lord and begged Him once again to help me, He began to remind me how far He has brought my family and me in other areas of life.  He led us to sell our four-bedroom, three-bath home with a huge garage that was overstuffed with excess and release about 90% of our physical possessions.  He brought us out of extreme debt bondage to a place of being 100% debt-free.  He released us from untold layers of spiritual bondage and the spirit of legalism.  He has opened our eyes and drawn us out of so many weighty, encumbering, besetting sins, all glory to God.  So, why is it so hard for me to get a breakthrough on the stronghold of obesity?

If God can enable me to let go of things that had become such idols, to leave the home that meant more to me than I could even put into words, to completely stop using credit, and to walk free from the entanglements of so many levels of spiritual bondage, why is the tackling of obesity any different?

"Behold, I am the LORD, the God of all flesh: is there any thing too hard for me?"  Jeremiah 32:27

"Behold, the LORD'S hand is not shortened, that it cannot save; neither his ear heavy, that it cannot hear."  Isaiah 59:1

My being physically overweight is no more God's fault than our being in debt up to our eyeballs was His fault.  This is something that I have allowed to let happen, and this is something that I am going to have to put forth the necessary effort and self-control to change just as much as we had to let go of the home we loved and say good-bye to so many beloved physical possessions.  Those possessions made their way into our house over years of accummulation and with our consent, just like these excess pounds made their way into my physical body with my permission.

Over two years ago, on June 1, 2018, I wrote this post.  On June 5, 2018, I published this post introducing The P.O.W.E.R. Tool©.  (You are more than welcome to download your own P.O.W.E.R. Tool© by clicking HERE.)  To say I wrote those posts over two years ago and to see the state I am in today fills me with incredible remorse, even shame.

One thing about tools, they only work and help you out if you pick them up and use them.  We have an electric washer and dryer in our basement.  It is there, at our disposal, to use any time we want 24/7.  We can either gather the laundry from the clothes hamper in our bedroom closet and the laundry basket on Zach's closet floor and walk that laundry to the basement, sort it, drop it in the wash machine, add laundry detergent, and turn the knob for it to begin OR we can leave our dirty laundry upstairs in our closets and allow it to pile up to the ceiling.  We can complain about how much we hate the piled-up dirty laundry, or we can implement our washer and dryer to help us get the laundry clean.

When the Lord inspired me to design the P.O.W.E.R. Tool, I had every intention of picking it up each morning and using it to help me stay on track.  Somehow, over time, I have completely stopped using this tool, and it shows—in very obvious, unhideable ways.  When I wrote this post, I needed to lose 60 pounds.  Yes, I said 60.  Imagine my unimaginable shock when I stepped on the doctor's scale a few months ago to find that my weight had balooned up to an unthinkable number, and suddenly 60 pounds didn't sound like so much to lose.  I am SO ashamed.  Just being real here ~ sorry if this post is too transparent.

Obviously, I didn't have to write and publish this post.  No one is standing over me with a gun to my head demanding I tell the whole world about the horrible stronghold I am dealing with on a daily basis.  I could pretend that I have been faithful and self-disciplined and stayed right on track.  I could lie, either by telling you those things or by saying I have steadily lost weight and have now reached my goal (OH, to be able to say that!) or I could just omit the truth and avoid the subject all together.  There is nothing compelling me to write this post, other than a sincere desire to help someone out there who is dealing with and fighting against obesity as much as I am.

I want you to know that you are not alone.  Today, I want to say to you that I am right there with you - even more overweight than I was on the day I wrote the post announcing to anyone who wanted to read it that I was 60 pounds overweight.

I wish I had a magic potion to offer you - believe me, if there were one, and I could get my hands on it, I would have already done so.  I wish I could tell you to click on a link that would guarantee a miracle cure for your obesity.  I wish I could hand you a simple solution that wouldn't require any type of effort on your part and would enable you to wake up tomorrow morning and see your ideal weight number miraculously appear on your digital scale.

I don't have anything to offer you but this ~

Sincere, heartfelt, genuine empathy because I am in the same, exact boat.  I hate the fact that I have wasted all this time and fallen into such weight-loss apostasy and gone completely off the rails.  TWO YEARS later, I am not only in the same, exact boat, "the boat" is straining even more now because I weigh substantially more than I did two years ago!

In my head, I KNOW all the right things to do.  I have even made vows to God (it really, really sobers me to realize and admit this), and I have repeatedly and shamefully broken those vows.  I can't begin to tell you how grateful I am for grace.  Without it, I would have been cut off a long time ago.  Why does He continue to forgive and put up with me when I consistently fail, fall short, and break my promises to Him?

"But thou art a God ready to pardon, gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and of great kindness."  Nehemiah 9:17

"For thou, Lord, art good, and ready to forgive; and plenteous in mercy unto all them that call upon Thee."  Psalm 86:5

"He hath not dealt with us after our sins; nor rewarded us according to our iniquities."  Psalm 103:10

It's a good thing, huh?

I'm not sure why I entitled this post, "Weight Loss Confessions."  I think I should have called it "Weight Gain Confessions," because weight loss doesn't show up in any of this equation.

My promises in this area don't really hold their "weight," pun intended, but I am going to openly proclaim that I am going to TRY to get back on the wagon today.  One of the things that is motivating me very much right now is Kalen Bruce's new book, "10 Branches of Growth."  Kalen is a USAF Soldier who writes from a perspective of being extremely disciplined.

And, that is the key.  The Lord is showing me while reading Kalen's book that this all comes down to that one word - discipline, of which "disciple" is the root word.  I call myself a disciple of Jesus, and true disciple of Jesus I am.  I love Him more now than I have in my whole life, and believe me, that is a lot of love because my heart has been tender toward Jesus for as far back as I can remember.  These days, I can hardly speak His name without tears.  He has brought my family and me through SO much, and He means everything to me.  I am His disciple - with all my heart.

But, physical weight is an area in which I am completely unhinged and out of control.  I am so NOT under His subjection in this slice of the Whole Person Pie©.  I can see so many areas of progress - I even feel (with much humility and realization of the fact I am subject to fail or slip at any given moment) that I have some slices of the pie completely minimized and under total submission to Jesus and His perfect will.  Obesity is a continual reminder of the fact that when it comes to the physical slice of the pie - that important slice that includes the fact that my body is His temple - I am so far off track.  It feels impossible to ever minimize this slice, but today, I am relying upon the truths in His Word.

"But Jesus beheld them, and said unto them, With men this is impossible; but with God all things are possible."  Matthew 19:26

"I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me."  Philippians 4:13

"Nay, in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him that loved us."  Romans 8:37

I am going to TRY to start picking up the P.O.W.E.R. Tool© each day and check off the boxes as I complete them.  I am going to TRY - try being the operative word - to start drinking the necessary amount of water each day and to get back on an exercise routine.  One of the things Kalen talks about in his book is intermittent fasting, where he only eats between 11 am and 7 pm each day.  He fasts during the other 16 hours.  I really think I can do this.  I think one of the pitfalls I have identified while reading "10 Branches of Growth" is late-night eating.

So, this is my accountability post, and this is me, asking you to please, please pray for me, will you?  I know without a doubt that some of my health issues would improve or even be elminated if I weren't lugging around this load of excess weight.  I long to follow Jesus in ALL areas of my life, including this one, and oh, my, in this one I am failing so miserably.  Biblical Minimalism is "a complete, whole-person release of anything unlike Jesus, a letting go of everything that hinders us from following Him wholeheartedly and single-mindedly, and a relinquishing of all that brings us under bondage to this earthly, very temporary life."  I desperately need His help in becoming an overcomer in this area of my life, and your prayers are a Divine gift!

If you would like to get your own copy of Kalen's new book that is helping motivate me so much, click HERE.  

Kalen recently granted us an exclusive Inner Views interview, and you can read it by clicking HERE!

And, just a reminder, if you would like to order our new book, "Biblical Minimalism," click HERE.

May God bless each of you on your journey, and I deeply appreciate your prayers for victory in this area of my life!

Minimizing The Obligational

There are eight "slices" of what I refer to as the Whole Person Pie©.  We have talked about the Spiritual, Physical, Mental, Emotional, Relational, Financial, Occupational, and today I'd like to delve into the eighth slice ~ the Obligational.

If you are interested in starting with the first post and working your way through the other seven categories, you can read the individual posts by clicking on these links:

Spiritual

Everything Springs From The Spiritual

Physical

Minimizing the Physical ~ Part One

Minimizing the Physical ~ Part Two

Physical ~ Part Three (The P.O.W.E.R. Tool©)

Physical ~ Part Four (Physical Possessions)

Physical ~ Part Five (Six Questions to Ask Yourself)

Mental

Mental

Emotional

Emotional ~ Part One

Emotional ~ Part Two (Fear)

Relational

Relational ~ Part One

Relational ~ Part Two

Financial

Financial ~ Part One ~ How to Eliminate Debt the Biblical Way

Financial ~ Part Two ~ Tithes and Offerings

Financial ~ Part Three ~ Are You A Slave To Your Spending Habits?

Occupational

Occupational ~ How To Discover Your Life's Calling

Obligational

Obligation - an act or course of action to which a person is morally or legally bound; a duty or commitment.

I don’t know about you, but when it comes to biting off more than I can chew, I seem to be an expert. So many times, throughout life, I have committed myself to do something, knowing full well, going into it, that it would take too much of my time and energy, and it was just plain not a good idea. More often than not, I have plunged forward anyhow, for one compelling reason or another. Too many times, it has been because I was trying to please others, instead of doing the thing I knew God wanted me to do. At the end of the day, each and every time I overrode the better judgment God instilled in me, I lived to regret thinking I knew better than Him.

Can anyone relate? If so, why do you suppose we do this? Why do we allow ourselves to be spread too thin? Are we so proud? Could it be that we want to appear capable of doing it all? When we take on too much, something, or more importantly, someone, suffers. There is no human way we can do it all and do it all sufficiently. So, why do we over-obligate ourselves? Taking on too many obligations will inevitably always end us up at the same destination. Total and complete burnout.

In Psalm 131:1, David made a statement that has come to mean a great deal to me. “LORD, my heart is not haughty, nor my eyes lofty: neither do I exercise myself in great matters, or in things too high for me.” I don’t know what David had to go through in order to learn this invaluable life lesson, but somewhere down the line, he came to the wise conclusion that there were things he simply should not try to do. There were situations that were beyond his scope of ability. There were matters that were past his capability of being able to administer. To override these facts and to try to force the issue of tackling tasks that were too much for him would be an expression of haughtiness and pride, and he had enough discernment to acknowledge what he could and could not do and enough wisdom to not pursue those ambitions. Being armed with this knowledge and having this understanding must have relieved untold stress and turmoil from David’s life.

There are plenty of types of obligations that can be damaging to us and may need to be eliminated from our lives and schedules. Anything that is distracting or detracting us from following after a simple, Christlike, unencumbered life should be closely examined, considered, and possibly walked away from and shed.

Sometimes it boils down to the simplicity of learning how and when to say “no." It is difficult to live a victorious, peace-filled life when you are overloaded with commitments and obligations that are beyond what God requires.

Oftentimes, God has to allow a situation to reach a certain height of misery before we realize a change needs to take place. Maybe He sees that it is enough already. Perhaps it is time to close that door...or chapter....so that we can live in this moment...today...now.

Sometimes, we can feel so stuck, we hopelessly assume that it is our never-ending lot in life, and we may as well learn to settle, accept, and deal with it. If you are in a situation that unceasingly vexes your spirit, causes you to lose sleep at night, makes you dread getting out of bed in the morning to face a new day, and fills your heart with anxiety and fear, I hope you will consider the possibility that God may be trying to arrest your attention. The misery you may be feeling could be coming from the fact that it is now time for a change. He may be trying to tell you to stop pursuing what is vexing you. He may have something so much better in store for you and your future. He will never force us against our will, but He loves us too much to fail to provide warning signs when we are headed in the wrong direction.

You are only one person, and that’s okay. You can only do so much, and that is all God requires.  It is good to find a quiet place of solitude in order to be alone with Him and to assess every, single obligation and commitment. Take a pen and paper, and make a list. Then, re-write that same list in the order of Biblical priorities.

While assessing your unique obligational slice of the Whole-Person Pie©, here is a little acronym to help you get on track.  I like to think of it as a M.O.P. to clean and tidy up the things that fall into the obligational category.

Management of Time - how am I spending it?  Are there excess or mindless ways I am allowing it to be wasted?  Life is short.  Time is precious.  Am I really managing the daily moments I am given in a Biblical, Christlike way?

Obligations - what have I committed myself to do?  Is the commitment really necessary? Is it beneficial to the ones I love most? Are we receiving any spiritual good from this? Does it bring fulfillment? Are our lives richer because of it? Has God shown me to do this, or do I just feel obligated by others to continue? Am I under bondage to anyone? Do I feel "guilted" into doing it?  Am I doing this for show or to earn accolades? Does this adversely affect the ones I love? Does it take time away from my family or keep me from being able to be what I should be to them? Is this meaningful?  Does it please God?  Take a long, hard look at even the "good" things, like ministry, Christian service, and outreach. 
 
Priorities - are they in order?  Do I make sure I put God first, above all else?  Do I take time for my spouse?  Do I nurture our marriage and pour into keeping it front and center?  Do I make sure my children know I am all in?  Can they come to me at any time, regardless?  Do they feel hesitant to approach me because I consistently convey the message that they are less important than the things I am doing? 

Ask yourself those hard questions, and be honest with your answers. Be still enough to hear the voice of God. Ask Him to show you what to minimize and what to keep.

If you find yourself in the wrong place or on the wrong path, may I encourage you, friend? All is not lost. Even when our well-meaning good intentions, do land us outside of God's "Plan A" for our lives, He allows all things (even the bad) to work together for our good. "And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose." Romans 8:28

The truth of the matter is, He has taken every, single event in our lives thus far to refine us...to mold and shape us into the people we are today. And if God reveals that we are headed in the wrong direction, what a comfort it is to know that He allows U-turns. We can make necessary adjustments and turn around from where we are right now. He has promised to show us the way if we ask and seek Him with our whole heart.

"Trust in the LORD with all thine heart, and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths." Proverbs 3:5,6

“And ye shall seek Me, and find Me when ye shall search for Me with all your heart.” Jeremiah 29:13

God bless you as you make hard choices and take necessary steps to whole-heartedly follow Christ and His perfect will for your life.

How To Discover Your Life's Calling

After taking a break from making our way around the whole-person pie©, I felt led to delve back into it today and discuss the next to the last slice—the occupational—that part of our lives that encompasses what we do for a living.

I believe God has a specific plan for every person He creates, and each life’s unique plan is equally important to Him. I don't believe any one of us are here by accident or coincidence. At the onset of the conception of a life, I believe God already knows the course He intends for that life, and His specific thoughts concerning its path are already in place. This is the thing we should put our energy and efforts into discovering. If we wholeheartedly seek God, He will faithfully reveal to us what He wants us to do.

"And I will bring the blind by a way that they knew not; I will lead them in paths that they have not known: I will make darkness light before them, and crooked things straight. These things will I do unto them, and not forsake them." Isaiah 42:16

"Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee, and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations." Jeremiah 1:5

"Before I was born the Lord called me; from my mother's womb He has spoken my name." Isaiah 49:1 (NIV)

I also believe that the way to true heart-peace, contentment, and fulfillment is by coming in line with God's intentions and following them in obedience. When one is out of God's will and purpose, there is an underlying restlessness, lack of contentment, and even outright misery. All of these are clear indications that something in our lives needs to be adjusted.

God created us with a free will, and, sadly, we often take our own liberties with that free will and choose our own way. We do not always follow His intended path or adhere to the direction and individual plans He has set in place for us. He leaves the choice to us.

I find it sad that there are people who go through their whole life never really living up to their full potential or finding that unique path God has chosen for them to walk. They never feel quite fulfilled, even though they may find success in many facets of life. In spite of outward prosperity and accomplishment, there is always that deep-down stirring that tells them that they are not quite doing exactly what they are meant to do while here on earth. Perhaps you have felt this and can relate.
True wholeness comes when we have surrendered what we think is best for us to God and when we have whole-heartedly relinquished control and are allowing Him to lead.

It isn't easy turning loose of the reins. We think we know what we do best when all along God sees our full potential capacity and parts of us that can expand and grow in ways we would never have dreamed.

Have you ever asked yourself these questions? What am I called to do? Why am I here? What is my true purpose? What was God's rationale for creating me? What is my unique, individual reason for being brought to the Kingdom, "for such a time as this"? (Esther 4:14)

It is never too late to turn around and change direction.  If you discover you are not in the occupation that best allows you to use your God-given, purposeful gifts, you can make adjustments.  It is my hope and prayer that answering these eleven questions will help you identify what it is that God may be calling you to do and help direct your thinking towards His perfect will and the life plan He has carved out for you.

1. What type of work do you like to do?
You know...the work that lights you up and makes you come to life. The task that makes you feel great and stokes a deep-down passion inside of you. The duty that you are most zealous about and can't seem to get enough of. The work that you need no compensation for doing...that the actual doing is its own reward. Consider the thought that God may have placed those likes in your heart for a reason.

2. What task(s) are you good at?
comes easiest to you? What seems to flow from you effortlessly? If it comes that naturally, it is an inborn, God-given talent. An endowed gift that He instilled in you at birth. He specifically gave it to you to set you on the right path…to give you a clear indicator as to the direction you should pursue. The ease with which you accomplish this is a sure-fire sign that this is something you need to consider and that this may the thing you are supposed to be doing. This is where your true beauty shines through, and quite likely, the purpose for which you were born.

3. For what kind of work have you earned the most compliments?
Not that we should go through life fishing for them, but sometimes, other people can recognize our calling before we can. They can see things we fail to notice about ourselves. We would be wise to listen to their input and take heed to their praise, not becoming proud or puffed up over it, but using it to open our eyes to what God may be trying to tell us through them. “…in the multitude of counselors there is safety.” Proverbs 11:14

4. What gives you the most peace?
At the end of the day, as you reflect over things you have done, what kind of work made you feel most at one with God? What gave you the deepest sense of having pleased Him? What task(s) drew you closest and most widely into His presence?

5. What are you most comfortable doing?
Let's face it. If it tears up your nerves every, single time you do it, if you are continually feeling sick to your stomach before doing it, it is more than likely not what God is calling you to do. I'm not talking about normal "stage-fright" or expected, natural pre-jitters. I am talking about walking around under an oppressive cloud that completely robs the joy from every other single element of your life. I am talking about it consuming your every thought and making you perpetually unhappy. This is not what being in the center of God's perfect will feels like. Believe me, if you are there...in this miserable place, He is trying to tell you something. It is time to take notice and get alone with Him, seeking Him with your whole heart for an escape route and re-direction. I am not saying you will always feel comfortable doing what God is asking you to do, as there will be trepidation, and you will be stretched and asked to leave your comfort zone, time after time, as you follow Jesus. But, it should be a "healthy" fear of failing Him and a sense of respect for Him, reliance and dependence upon Him, and a desire to please and satisfy Him....not an overwhelming sense of never-ending misery and constant dread.

6. What do you dream of doing?
Did you ever think that God may have placed the seeds of those dreams in your heart in the first place? Did you ever consider that maybe those dreams were actually and purposely put there for the sole purpose of directing your life steps? Psalm 37:4 says, "Delight thyself also in the Lord, and He shall give thee the desires of thine heart." If you are 100% into serving God, if pleasing Him brings delight to your inmost being, did you ever stop and wonder if maybe He put those desires there? That maybe they are not self-driven desires, but God-planted dreams to point you in the right direction of His perfect will for you? It is a beautiful thing when God's plans and your dreams completely agree.  “The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord:  and he delighteth in His way.”  Psalm 37:23

7. What have you wanted to do for the longest time?
I'm not talking about your bucket list of things you want to accomplish before you die. I'm talking about those childhood aspirations....as far back as you can remember. What was it back then that you admired the most? We all take rides on ships in the night...passing fantasies that quickly lose their appeal and trial runs that soon reveal we aren't cut out for the long haul. But, dig deep. What is that nagging thing that keeps coming back to you over and over—that thing that came to you longest ago and still brings a sense of excitement every time you think about taking a step in that direction? If it has lingered and simmered in the back of your mind for this long, there may be something to it, and it is worth seeking God's will about, at the very least.

8. What fulfills you most?
Fulfill means: to measure up to...to satisfy. What satisfies your need for feeling you have measured up to your potential? Think about it. The task that makes you feel most fulfilled when you are finished—that convinces you that you have done something that really mattered, made a difference and satisfied your need to feel useful and necessary and even important. Everyone needs to feel that they are making the contribution they were put on this earth to make. Until you do that, nothing else will quite fill that longing deep inside for accomplishment.

9. Who do you most admire?
Not saying that all of us can be a Billy Graham or reach the stature of the ones we most admire. Nor do I condone placing people on pedestals, as we are all subject to fail, and Jesus Christ is the only perfect person and the only One we should ever seek to emulate. But, what is it about the person you admire that you find so admirable? Is it what they do? Is it a characteristic? What draws you to them? Why do you look up to and respect them? Give it some thought and ask God to show you if there is a Divinely-appointed reason for your esteem for and regard of them. He may be calling you to follow a similar course. He may have placed that person in your life to serve as an example and to light a fire in you in order to set your thoughts towards a particular path. The idea is worth exploring with Him alone in prayer.

10. When have you felt most sincerely respected by others? 
You know—those moments when it wasn't about self-glory, but about earning the true appreciation of someone else for the selfless effort you had put into something. It is important that our life work is valued by at least one other person besides ourselves. To earn that is an immeasurable gift. Think back over your life and try to recall a moment you felt that something you did gleaned genuine validation from another person. Chances are, God permitted the right person to be there at the right time to bestow affirmation that we did the right thing and were walking His designated path. Not that we should do what we do with the sole purpose of pleasing other people. That will never happen all the time and is a fickle, unreliable, untrustworthy, inaccurate gauge. Mom used to tell me that you can please some of the people some of the time, but you will never please all of the people all of the time. To try is a senseless, exhausting, disappointing endeavor and a complete waste of time and energy. But, there is within the heart of every one of us, the need to feel at least one other person's respect. It is important.

11. What most builds your self-esteem?
Not your pride, not your ego, but your true sense of valuing yourself as an important part of God's grand design. What makes you feel most a part of that design? What makes you feel that you really matter? That your life is important? What contributions have you made that convinced you that only you could have filled that particular need? Let's face it, we need to feel good inside...about ourselves. If the whole world applauds our efforts and accomplishments, it won't matter if we do not have within a sense of self-worth and the sweet assurance that we are indeed doing His will and fulfilling our life's mission.

Look for the clues, my friend. God has a particular purpose for your life. There is a Divinely-appointed reason that you are here right now —right where you are. You may look around at your current circumstances and feel you are on a dead-end street. That there is no way out....no path available to reach your full potential for God. I beg to differ with you. Where this is GOD, there is a way. And God is everywhere, even in the darkest, most impossible dungeons of hopelessness and despair. He wants to use you. Your life and your past experiences—the good, the bad, the ugly, and the unmentionable. Your talents—yes, you have them. Your skills—He has enabled you to develop them to this point. Your uniqueness—there is no one else quite like you. No one else can fulfill your purpose. No one else can reach your inner circle—not in the way you can. No one else will do. Only you.

Life is too short to sell yourself short. To settle for less than God's best for your life. To drift along, aimlessly, then pass off the scene, never having reached your full potential, never having accomplished God's intentions for you, and never having found the deepest sense of the joy in knowing you lived out your whole reason for being on planet earth.

If you are on the wrong path, turn around. You are allowed, you know. God allows U-turns...at any and all points along the way. All you have to do is follow His lead.

Get quiet. Shut out the noise, and listen. Watch the signs He places in your path. Be aware of His presence. Make necessary adjustments as He points them out and at every given opportunity. Do what you need to do to search for Him with all your heart. Discover His perfect will for you, and take the necessary steps to bring yourself in complete alignment with it. Then, stay the course, my friend.
He will walk with you every step of the way, He will never leave you, and He will, at life's end, lead you ever safely to the other side—at peace and happy in knowing you fulfilled His reason for creating you in the first place.

Tithes and Offerings

In this post, we began a discussion on the financial slice of the whole-person pie© and talked about God's way of eliminating debt. Today, I'd like to linger on that slice and delve more into the subject of money. How does God want us to handle it? Does it matter to Him? Should the financial slice of the whole-person pie© be off-limits to God? Should we endeavor to bring all of the other seven slices into alignment with His Word, but reserve our money to ourselves?

The definition of Biblical Minimalism© and the premise of this blog is, "a complete, whole-person release of anything unlike Jesus, a letting go of everything that hinders us from following Him wholeheartedly and single-mindedly, and a relinquishing of all that brings us under bondage to this earthly, very temporary life."

In order to follow Jesus wholeheartedly, we must hold nothing back. It will require us to relinquish control over every "slice" of what makes up our whole person. This includes the money He allows to fall into our hands, and I believe we should strive to follow His Word and example in the allocation of it—beginning with the first ten percent.

I've heard a lot of controversy and discussion over the matter of tithing ~ some argue against it, saying it was strictly an Old Testament requirement but no longer necessary under grace. Others say we should give to God's cause, but the amount is not important, and a sporadic way of giving is acceptable. There are plenty of other ideas and opinions. I don't know about you, but I really don't care about opinions and ideas. I want to know the truth. Only the truth will set us free, and the whole, absolute truth can only be found in the Word of God. It is His Word that will be the rule of law when we stand before Him and give an account of what we have done in this life.

God's Word is actually very clear on the subject of money and the kind of financial stewards we are to be. Here are some Biblical precepts that I hope will be an encouragement and help as you seek to bring this slice of the pie into alignment with God's will. (All Scriptural emphasis is added.)

Give to God first

Matthew 6:33 says, "But seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added unto you."

“Honor the LORD with thy substance, and with the firstfruits of all thine increase: so shall thy barns be filled with plenty, and thy presses shall burst out with new wine.” Proverbs 3:9,10

“Render to Caesar the things that are Caesar's, and to God the things that are God's.” Mark 12:17

Just as the government requires a mandatory deduction of taxes from a paycheck before it is ever released to an employee, God’s part should be returned to Him as soon as money is within our possession. It is rightfully His, and to Him, it should be rendered ~ first, before all else.

The word "tithe" literally means "tenth"

It doesn't mean "whatever you can afford this week" or "however much you have left over after paying the bills" or "dropping the loose change in your pocket into the offering plate" or anything other than 10% of the money you are given.

• Abraham set the precedent and his is the first biblical account of what it means to tithe. 

"And Melchizedek king of Salem brought out bread and wine. (He was priest of God Most High.) And he blessed him and said, “Blessed be Abram by God Most High, Possessor of heaven and earth; and blessed be God Most High, who has delivered your enemies into your hand!” And Abram gave him a tenth of everything." Genesis 14:18-20

• Jacob followed the pattern by vowing to give God ten percent. 

"Then Jacob made a vow, saying, “If God will be with me and will keep me in this way that I go, and will give me bread to eat and clothing to wear, so that I come again to my father's house in peace, then the Lord shall be my God, and this stone, which I have set up for a pillar, shall be God's house. And of all that you give me I will give a full tenth to you.” Genesis 28:20-22 

• God cemented the definition of tithing very specifically when He gave the law to Moses and laid the ground rules. 

"Every tithe of the land, whether of the seed of the land or of the fruit of the trees, is the Lord's; it is holy to the Lord. And every tithe of herds and flocks, every tenth animal of all that pass under the herdsman's staff, shall be holy to the Lord." Leviticus 27:30,32

"You shall tithe all the yield of your seed that comes from the field year by year. At the end of every three years, you shall bring out all the tithe of your produce in the same year and lay it up within your towns. And the Levite, because he has no portion or inheritance with you, and the sojourner, the fatherless, and the widow, who are within your towns, shall come and eat and be filled, that the Lord your God may bless you in all the work of your hands that you do." Deuteronomy 14:22,28-29

Giving is a New Testament command

"Give, and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you." Luke 6:38

“Every man according as he purposeth in his heart, so let him give; not grudgingly, or of necessity: for God loveth a cheerful giver.”  2 Corinthians 9:7

"Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye pay tithe of mint and anise and cummin and have omitted the weightier matters of the law, judgment, mercy, and faith: these ought ye to have done, and not to leave the other undone." Matthew 23:23

The ESV words it this way, "“But woe to you Pharisees! For you tithe mint and rue and every herb, and neglect justice and the love of God. These you ought to have done, without neglecting the others."

In other words, Jesus was saying that they should include and demonstrate judgment, mercy, and faith, but they should also continue to tithe. In this solitary statement, Jesus confirmed that tithing is absolutely a New Testament command that continues to be God's will.

Disobedience steals from God and those in need

Malachi 3:8-10 says, “Will a man rob God? Yet ye have robbed Me. But ye say, "Wherein have we robbed Thee?" In tithes and offerings. Ye are cursed with a curse: for ye have robbed Me, even this whole nation. Bring ye all the tithes into the storehouse, that there may be meat in My house, and prove Me now herewith, saith the LORD of hosts, if I will not open you the windows of heaven, and pour you out a blessing, that there shall not be room enough to receive it.”

This passage mentions both tithes and offerings. Since a tithe is equal to one/tenth, any giving above that amount is considered an offering unto the Lord. Both are mentioned, individually, so it is evident that God wants us to do both, to give as much as we can, and He will reward us accordingly. NOT that we should ever give from the motivation of hoping to receive, but blessing is the reward for obedience.

Refusing to put God first in our finances is robbing Him of what is rightfully His. When we fail to give to His cause, we not only rob Him, but the ultimate effect is that we take from those who are in need. God is all-sufficient. He has no need, but His children do. Someone else suffers from our failure to tithe.

There are so many who are hurting and in such dire need. How can we withhold help from them, when the proof of our love for God is demonstrated and measured by the degree with which we love our fellow man?

I John 3:17 says, “But whoso hath this world's good, and seeth his brother have need, and shutteth up his bowels of compassion from him, how dwelleth the love of God in him?”

When the love of God is in the heart, it cannot be contained. It automatically bursts forth when we see and recognize that someone else has a need. Just as when Jesus was on earth, many times, He was “moved with compassion”, we will not be able to turn away from those whose plight of poverty and need we could alleviate and remedy by our giving.

What could be more satisfying than to know God has used you to bless and provide for another person? The blessing is even multiplied when you give to those who cannot give back.

“Then said He also to him that bade Him, "When thou makest a dinner or a supper, call not thy friends, nor thy brethren, neither thy kinsmen, nor thy rich neighbors; lest they also bid thee again, and a recompense be made thee. But when thou makest a feast, call the poor, the maimed, the lame, the blind: And thou shalt be blessed; for they cannot recompense thee: for thou shalt be recompensed at the resurrection of the just.” Luke 14:12-14

“I have shewed you all things, how that so laboring ye ought to support the weak, and to remember the words of the Lord Jesus, how He said, It is more blessed to give than to receive.” Acts 20:35

Proverbs 3:27 says, “Withhold not good from them to whom it is due when it is in the power of thine hand to do it.”

The power over the money God blesses us with is in our own hand. We can decide whether to give or to withhold…to reach out or to be selfish… to follow the world’s example of “hoard and accumulate all you possibly can” or to imitate Jesus’ example of giving all He had.

Matthew 10:24 says, “The disciple is not above his master, nor the servant above his lord.”

If we would be followers of Christ, should we not give as unselfishly as He gave?

Again, the proof is in the love. Jesus said, “By this shall all men know that ye are My disciples if ye have love one to another.” John 13:35

Jesus also said, “Fear not, little flock; for it is your Father's good pleasure to give you the kingdom. Sell that ye have, and give alms; provide yourselves bags which wax not old, a treasure in the heavens that faileth not, where no thief approacheth, neither moth corrupteth. For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.” Luke 12:32-34

Truly, we have been so abundantly blessed, and there are so many who need our excess.

"Freely ye have received, freely give.” Matthew 10:8

"There was not a needy person among them, for as many as were owners of lands or houses sold them and brought the proceeds of what was sold and laid it at the apostles' feet, and it was distributed to each as any had need." Acts 4:34-35

God's economy doesn't work like man's. The more you give, the more He gives back. My grandmother used to say, "You can't outgive God," and it has been proven many times through the years that she was right. I feel sure every person reading this can vouch for the validity of that statement.

As we sacrifice, put God first in our finances, and reach out to meet the needs of others, He will absolutely take care of us and supply our needs.

How To Eliminate Debt ~ The Biblical Way

We move on now to the financial slice of the Whole-Person Pie©.

It is amazing to me how relevant the Word of God remains.  It is every bit as powerful and on target as it was the day it was written.  The world around us can make finances seem complicated, and the thought of bringing them under submission to God's will can seem daunting.  The truth is when we view them through the lens of God's Word, they are quite simple.

The more we strive to live our lives as Jesus lived His, the more we realize that it is completely against His will and what He stood for to live life weighted down. Debt is a heavy burden to bear that creates untold stress and unnecessary worry.  It wreaks havoc and causes strain in marital relationships and is a constant drain on one’s nerves and emotional state.  Living indebted feels like being shackled to a ball and chain.  Debt is a cruel, relentless taskmaster, and God never intended that His children live enslaved to such.  His Word is very clear and has much to say about debt.

“Owe no man anything, but to love one another: for he that loveth another hath fulfilled the law.” Romans 13:8  (KJV)

 “For the LORD thy God blesseth thee, as He promised thee: and thou shalt lend unto many nations, but thou shalt not borrow, and thou shalt reign over many nations, but they shall not reign over thee.” Deuteronomy 15:6  (KJV)

“The LORD shall open unto thee His good treasure, the heaven to give the rain unto thy land in his season, and to bless all the work of thine hand: and thou shalt lend unto many nations, and thou shalt not borrow.” Deuteronomy 28:12  (KJV)

"The rich ruleth over the poor and the borrower is servant to the lender."  Proverbs 22:7  (KJV)

We have all made bad choices, bought more than we should have or intended to, and fell into the credit trap.  Wherever you find yourself, debt-wise, there is hope, my friend, and there is help to be found in God's Word.  Jesus came to give us deliverance from all forms of bondage, and that includes the area of indebtedness.

Here are Biblical steps to reach freedom from debt.

1.  Face the truth.
Jesus said, "You will know the truth, and the truth will set you free."  John 8:32  (CSB)
The path to any type of freedom begins with the single courageous step of acknowledging what is true.  The first step to recovering from indebtedness is to figure out how much you owe. Until you do that, you will more than likely never make any changes to your spending habits and the way you handle your finances. In order to accurately assess your situation, you will need to be completely honest—with yourself, with your spouse and family, and with God. As cringe-worthy as your plight may be, face it head-on.  Own what is real, and embrace it.  It is extremely liberating to overcome the hurdle of finding and facing the truth.

2.  Forgive yourself.
"He will not always chide: neither will He keep his anger forever.  He hath not dealt with us after our sins; nor rewarded us according to our iniquities."  Psalm 103:9-10  (KJV)
Stop beating yourself up.  What's done is done.  You cannot do one single thing about changing the outcome of where you are right now.  Learn from what you regret, and move forward.  Punishing yourself and living in a state of remorse won't undo a thing.  God forgives, shouldn't you?

3.  Stop borrowing.
"Don't be one of those who enter agreements, who put up security for loans.  If you have nothing with which to pay, even your bed will be taken from under you."  Proverbs 22:26-27  (CSB)
The third step to debt recovery is to stop incurring more debt. God does not need a credit card to supply your needs, nor would He ever require you to do something that would cause disobedience to His Word.  It is not His will that you incur more debt even in this “give it to me now,” “buy now, pay later” age of time.
Jesus even mentioned debts when He taught His disciples how to pray. “And forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.” Matthew 6:12  (KJV)
He would never instruct us to ask our Father in Heaven to forgive us for something, then ask us to turn around and repeat the same offense.
This can seem like a hard truth to swallow, when it comes to making larger purchases, such as a home or an automobile.  In today’s world, to even imagine or suggest that someone not go into a mortgage or car loan debt seems preposterous. But, what if we all only purchased what we could actually afford to pay for with cash?
There is no shame in renting someone else’s property instead of owning our own if it means avoiding the pitfall and bondage of long-term debt. Laden with debt, we do not really “own” something anyway.  What if we lowered our standard of living down to the size of home we actually need, instead of trying to conform to the world’s standards and dictations of what is necessary?  The truth is that we need very little in order to not only survive but to thrive.
A big part of refusing to buy things on credit and not incurring more debt has to do with contentment. Contentment is something that has to be learned. It is not a trait with which we are inherently born. The Apostle Paul said, “Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: everywhere and in all things, I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.” Philippians 4:11-13
If buying something requires going into debt, the bondage that ensues is just plain not worth it and is counter-productive to the calm of minimal living.
Things that are worth having are worth waiting for until they can be purchased with cash. Waiting on God’s timing for provision produces the sweet fruit of patience, and there is so much rest that comes from thanking God for what we have and trusting Him for what we need.
"But godliness with contentment is great gain.  For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out.  And having food and raiment let us be therewith content." I Timothy 6:6-8  (KJV)

4.  Sell What You Have to Pay What You Owe.
In 2 Kings 4:1-7, we find a remarkable story. A widow came to Elisha and told him that her husband had died.  Upon his death, she was left with unpaid debt, and, as a result, the creditor was threatening to take her two sons as slaves. Elisha responded, "How can I help you? Tell me, what do you have in your house?" "Your servant has nothing there at all," she said, "except a small jar of olive oil."  Elisha said, "Go around and ask all your neighbors for empty jars. Don't ask for just a few.  Then go inside and shut the door behind you and your sons. Pour oil into all the jars, and as each is filled, put it to one side."  She left him and shut the door behind her and her sons. They brought the jars to her and she kept pouring.  When all the jars were full, she said to her son, "Bring me another one." But he replied, "There is not a jar left." Then the oil stopped flowing.  She went and told the man of God, and he said, "Go, sell the oil and pay your debts. You and your sons can live on what is left."

Selling what we have to pay what we owe is such a simple solution to indebtedness.  Though it is radical and 100% counter-cultural, it makes perfect sense.  Where can we look with confidence to find such obvious clarity?  To God's Word, of course.

Living in a house we cannot afford, driving cars that require us to keep our noses to the grindstone, having to use credit cards to finance a lifestyle far beyond our means just so we can impress others and fit into someone else's "mold"—these are the things that do not make sense.  It all boils down to one question—what do you want most?  To be debt-free or to hold on to what you "own?"

The woman could have clung to her olive oil and it would have prevented God from working a Divine-intervention miracle of such magnitude that it is still inspiring faith to this day.

God is able to take what we have and multiply it into what we need if we will take Him at His word and walk in obedience to Him, regardless of how absurd or radical it seems.  He takes the insignificant and insufficient and turns it into overflow and abundance.

Where do you find yourself, my friend?  Does your situation seem impossible?  Perhaps you owe more than your assets are worth and liquidating them would not produce enough to cover the entirety of your indebtedness.  Any elimination of debt is a good thing, even if you aren't able to wipe the slate completely clean with one swipe.  Don't lose hope.  Focus on what God can do, not on your circumstances.

He took a small jar of olive oil and kept multiplying it until it produced enough oil to not only pay off every, single one of the widow's debts, but there was enough surplus to provide a livelihood for her and her sons.  (2 Kings 4:1-7)

He took a little boy's lunch of five loaves of bread and two fish and not only fed over 5,000 people, but there was enough left over to fill a basket for each of the twelve disciples.  (John 6:4-13)

He took one smooth stone in the hand of little David and killed a giant over nine feet tall.  (I Samuel 17:20-51)

He took a handful of flour and a little oil and stretched it to feed and sustain Elijah, a widow, and her son throughout the duration of a drought.  (I Kings 17:8-16)

He took a jawbone of a donkey in the hand of Samson and killed 1,000 of his enemies.  (Judges 15:11-15)

He took a cloud the size of a man's hand and produced not just a small downpour but an abundance of rain.  (I Kings 18:41-45)

He took a tiny newborn baby boy born in the lowliest of settings and made Him the Savior of the whole world.  (Luke 2:1-20 & John 19:1-34)

Let Him lead the way, and be pliable and willing to take His path to freedom, even if it is not your preferred way out of debt.

It is absolutely God's will that we repay our indebtedness.  He wants us to walk free and unencumbered.  Yes, it is a lofty goal but if we follow our Example and are willing to take the humble road He trod, we will find the complete liberation that living a life of self-denial affords.  Nothing in this world could ever bring such peace.

The Most Important Relationship of All

I don't want to move on from the relational slice of the Whole-Person Pie© without giving due focus to the most important relationship in all of our lives—our relationship with the Lord, Jesus Christ.  It all begins with "The Call"—that moment you first hear the Shepherd's voice, asking you to forsake all and follow Him—the moment that every subsequent moment points back to—the one that (however significant or inconsequential it seemed at the time) you later realize served as the catalyst that changed your life forever.  Our response to that call is the single most important decision we will ever make because that choice will ultimately determine where our never-dying soul will spend its eternity.

After making the decision to respond to Jesus' initial call by choosing to follow Him and pattern our lives after Him and the earthly life He lived, we will find that there are many subsequent "calls" as the road from earth to Heaven becomes increasingly narrow.  Each call presents a fork in the road as the call necessitates a response.  The motivation behind each of those ensuing calls is to pull us ever closer to and invite us into a deeper level of intimacy with Him.  His desire, all along this Christian journey, is that you and I would make a steadily-continuing shift from an earthly to an eternal focus.

It was one of these subsequent calls that spawned a deep-seated desire in my little family and me to follow Him yet closer and let go of anything and everything that kept us from whole-hearted surrender and service to Him.  A complete dedication to His purpose initiated our "launch out into the deep" on this path to what we have come to call "Biblical Minimalism©" and compelled us to sell our 4 bedroom, 3 bath, oversized 2-car garage home and let go of 90% of our personal physical possessions.

I don't know what your minimizing journey looks like but if we dig deep enough we will find the same root reason at the bottom of each Christian's desire to pursue a Biblical path to minimalism—we all intensely hunger for Him and long to live our lives like Jesus lived His.  We all yearn for the peace and simplicity that such a life affords.  We all want to let go of the things of this world for the sake of a higher call.  We want to run a successful Christian race unencumbered by the things of this world, free from the bondage to people and things, unfettered by selfish ambition and pursuits, unbound by the shackles of sin, and completely unchained to anything that is not like Christ.

I have often said that the one passage of Scripture that most fully encapsulates the meaning of Biblical Minimalism is Hebrews 12:1-2, "Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us, looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God."  Along with that Scripture, there is a song that has been coming to mind that also encapsulates what Biblical Minimalism really means.

It is simply called, "Consecration."  Written in 1907 by Mildred E. Howard, its words are every bit as relevant today as they were 111 years when it was first composed.

Since Jesus gave His life for me,

Should I not give Him mine?

I’m consecrated, Lord, to Thee,

I shall be wholly Thine.

My life, O Lord, I give to Thee,

My talents, time, and all;

I’ll serve Thee, Lord, Thine own to be,

I’ll hear Thy faintest call.

I care not where my Lord directs,

His purpose I’ll fulfill;

I know He everyone protects

Who does His holy will.

Though He may call across the sea,

With Jesus I will go;

And tell the lost of love so free,

Till all His power may know.

My home and friends are dear to me,

Yet He is dearer still;

In my affections first He’ll be,

And first His righteous will.

My all, O Lord, to Thee I’ll give,

Accept it as Thine own;

For Thee alone, I’ll ever live,

My heart shall be Thy throne.

To say those words, and mean them from the heart, is truly a cry of surrender and total consecration.  Too many times, as Christians, we surrender some of ourselves to God.  We pick and choose the areas in which we want Him to have full control, and we hold Him at arms' length, reserving certain other parts to ourselves, attaching an invisible "off limits" sign.    If we are to run a winning Christian race, we have to give it all we've got, holding nothing back from the One who gave all for us.

Is there anything you are holding back from Him?  Is there any area of life where He doesn't reign supreme?  On any of the eight Whole-Person Pie© slices—the spiritual, physical, mental, emotional, relational, financial, occupational, and obligational—do you see a "No Trespassing" sign?

In closing, I want to share the lyrics to and video of another song that is so relevant to this discussion.  It is called, "The Secret Place" and was recorded by The Booth Brothers.  Please scroll down to hear Ronnie Booth's story of his and Michael's Dad's testimony followed by them singing this moving song.

THE SECRET PLACE

My heart is like a house,

One day I let the Savior in,

There are many rooms,

Where we would visit now and then.

But then one day He saw that door,

I knew the day had come too soon,

I said, “Jesus, I’m not ready,

For us to visit in that room.

‘Cause that’s a place in my heart,

Where even I don’t go,

I have some things hidden there,

I don’t want no one to know.”

But He handed me the key,

With tears of love on His face,

He said, “I want to make you clean,

Let me go in your secret place.”

So I opened up the door,

And as the two of us walked in,

I was so ashamed,

His light revealed my hidden sin.

But when I think about that room now,

I’m not afraid anymore,

‘Cause I know my hidden sin,

No longer hides behind that door.

That was a place in my heart,

Where even I wouldn’t go,

I had some things hidden there,

I didn’t want no one to know.

But He handed me the key,

With tears of love on His face,

And He made me clean,

I let Him in my secret place.

Is there a place in your heart,

Where even you won’t go?

The Secret Place ~ The Booth Brothers

Minimizing Detrimental Relationships

Hello, everyone!

First, I want to say a big, hearty "Welcome!" to all of the new subscribers!  I am ever so grateful to have you on board.  God has blessed me again and again by your support and encouragement!

I'll be honest.  I have been trying with all my might to move on to the 5th slice of the Whole-Person Pie©, and let me just tell you, it is a tough one because it is all about relationships.  I have spent hours seeking the Lord for extra help on this one.  Relationships are tricky, and handling them in a Christlike manner is challenging.

Each one of the eight "slices" of the Whole-Person Pie© presents its own unique challenges, but the relational slice is the one that most affects other people and their feelings.  It is one thing to work on ourselves and minimize the spiritual, physical, mental, and emotional excess because all of those categories are, for the most part, internal and personal.  It is quite another to analyze and work on the relationships in our lives because they involve the external and other human beings.

No man is an island.  Even the most reclusive of us must have contact with another human being at some time or another and the things we do and the choices we make absolutely affects other people.

There are basically two kinds of relationships—those we choose and those in which we are involved through no choice of our own.

"No Choice" Relationships

Examples of relationships that are woven into the fabric of our lives outside of anything we can control are close and extended family members, in-laws, co-workers, fellow church members, and business associates.  These people are a part of our lives by default, but they are not there by accident.  As Christians, we know that everything that touches our lives has first passed through the hands of our Creator, and He is winnowing our path—leaving in and taking out according to His will.  We do not have the option of choosing our grand-parents, parents, siblings, or extended family members.  We have no control over the people who work with and around us, who choose to go to the same church we do, or who are a part of the business networks that life and careers dictate and require.  We have no power to choose who our close and extended family members marry or have as friends.  Though we do have the privilege of choosing who we marry, we have no control over who their parents, siblings, extended family members, or friends happen to be.  If we find them to be difficult, we have the option of not marrying the one we love because of our dislike for their family, but if we choose to unite in marriage with someone, their family will inevitably be a part of our lives as a part of the "package."

"No Choice," uninvited relationships encompass all of the people who are a part of our lives (whether we want them to be or not) due to circumstances that we did not cause or create.  They are in our lives outside the realm of our own preference or choosing.

Choice Relationships

These are the relationships over which we have full control.  Each person who falls into this category is there because we have invited them to be.  I have heard the comment, "If we weren't family, we surely wouldn't be friends."  When "no-choice" relationships happen to also be "choice" relationships, it is a rare gift!

The Inner Circle

Each one of us has an "inner circle"—a place occupied by select people that we choose to allow in.  The people in closest proximity to us, whether they be "choice" or "no choice" relationships, greatly influence and affect us, either for good or bad.  Biblical minimalism is the pursuit of bringing every area of our lives into alignment with how Jesus lived His life and wants us to live ours.  This surely includes making sure we are selective with who we permit into our inner circle—that part of our relationships over which we have complete jurisdiction.

There is a big difference in someone being a part of our lives and someone being a part of our inner circle.  Just because someone is in our lives due to circumstances beyond our control (whether by birth, marriage, or other reasons) does not mean this person has earned the right to be in our inner circle, nor does it mean they should be in our inner circle.

Jesus had a close inner circle.  He spent 40 days fasting in the wilderness, being sorely tested and tried by satan, before He made the decision as to whom He would choose to be His elect twelve closest followers.  This was one of the most weighty decisions Jesus made while walking this earth.  He had to get it right.  Of the twelve He chose, only three were included in certain situations.  The Bible doesn't specifically divulge His reasons for giving Peter, James, and John exclusive access to particular events, but we know they were the only three who were invited to witness The Transfiguration (Matthew 17:1), His raising Jairus' daughter from the dead (Luke 8:49-51), and to be the most intimate witnesses to His anguish in the Garden of Gethsemane (Matthew 26:36-37).  There are many thoughts and theories on why these three men were particularly chosen for such monumental events in Jesus' life, but regardless what His reasons were, it is clear that Jesus chose to have a deliberately-chosen circle of twelve friends, with only three of those friends being granted fuller access.

Everything Jesus did while on earth was intentional.  Every decision He made was full of purpose. It is important imperative that we pay attention to the details if we are to successfully follow Him.  He didn't just choose Peter, James, and John to be granted a higher level of access at one time, but this happened three distinct times.  (There may have been more, but we are told of three.)  This was a well-planned and purposely-considered pattern of behavior, and it should not be overlooked as we seek to align our walk of faith with the way our Master lived.

There are people in all of our lives who are a detrimental influence.  Perhaps they are friends with whom we had a relationship before becoming a disciple of Jesus.  If we are choosing to follow Him and they are continuing to walk a path that is contrary to the way Jesus lived His life, sometimes this conflict of interest evolves into a fork in the road where a parting of ways is necessary for our spiritual wellbeing.  I am not defending adopting a "holier-than-thou" mindset or that we should ever judge others, but I am saying that it is so easy to be drawn back into pre-Christian behavior if we continue to keep ungodly influence in our inner circle.

PLEASE NOTE:  (Due to complexity and post length, I am purposely not including marital relationships or relationships with children in this mix.  For the sake of this discussion, my intentions are strictly to include and explore all relationships, other than spousal and parental.)

If detrimental relationships are ones that we have chosen and invited into our lives, it is a fairly simple process to minimize or completely eliminate contact.  Not that it will be easy or without fallout, but by God's grace, it can, and probably should be done.  It is quite a different situation when the destructive relationship is a part of our lives by default, such as with a parent, sibling, in-law, or other close or extended relative.  What to do then?  It is heartbreaking and complicated to come to the realization that someone we dearly love or someone with whom we cannot completely avoid contact is bringing ungodly influence into our lives simply by being a part of it.

We cannot change another person or their destructive habits and behavior no matter how much we want to, and the best things we can do are to pray for them and gently pull away for the sake of our own Christian walk.  This is never going to be easy, and misunderstanding is sometimes a sad albeit inevitable repercussion because sensitive feelings and emotions of others are involved.  Those who are not following Jesus will not understand the motivations of those who want to follow Him with all their hearts.

"But the natural man receiveth not the things of the Spirit of God: for they are foolishness unto him: neither can he know them, because they are spiritually discerned."  1 Corinthians 2:14  (KJV)

When we become a Christian, we are a new creation.  Our hearts are regenerated, and we are changed from the inside out.  That change will manifest in every area of our lives, including the selection of those in our inner circle.

"Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new."  2 Corinthians 5:17  (KJV)

All of us have dealt with rejection, betrayal, and hurt, and it is hard to think that due to a choice we initiate, however necessary it may be, a loved one may experience similar pain.  When it becomes obvious to us that we need to "evict" someone from our inner circle or put some distance between ourselves and another person, it is so important to seek God's will and ask for Holy Spirit discernment and wisdom concerning the imminent misunderstandings that will ensue in the aftermath of severed or minimized relationships.

Jesus understands hard choices.  There is no situation we will ever face that He has not already encountered something similar.

"For we have not an high priest which cannot be touched with the feeling of our infirmities; but was in all points tempted like as we are, yet without sin."  Hebrews 4:15  (KJV)

Jesus absolutely dealt with relatives and loved ones who were a source of vexation.  

"He came to His own people, and even they rejected Him."  John 1:11  (NLT)

Concerning familial relationships, Jesus said,

"For Jesus, Himself testified, that a prophet hath no honor in his own country."  John 4:44  (KJV)

"And a man's foes shall be they of his own household."  Matthew 10:36  (KJV)

Remember when Jesus was rejected in His own hometown?  They not only rejected Him, they tried to push Him over a cliff!  (You can read all about it in Luke 4:16-30.)

I find it very interesting that after His hometown showed such blatant disrespect, disregard, and complete repudiation, Jesus did not linger around and keep wasting time on such detrimental relationships.  He knew the dangers of listening to the wrong things for too long, and He refused to allow anyone to deter Him from His purpose.  He got away from them, and He moved on to pour His heart into those who would listen to Him, accept Him, and who were hungry for the truth.  Luke 4:30-32 says, "But He walked right through the crowd and went on his way.  Then He went down to Capernaum, a town in Galilee, and on the Sabbath He taught the people.  They were amazed at His teaching because His words had authority."  (NIV)

Jesus did not condone, nor did He require His disciples to keep pursuing such frustration and vexation.

To His disciples, He said, "And whosoever shall not receive you, nor hear your words, when ye depart out of that house or city, shake off the dust of your feet."  Matthew 10:14  (KJV)

"Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you."  Matthew 7:6  (KJV)

Here are some questions you may want to ask as you seek God's will concerning the need of minimizing relationships in your life.

• Is this person a part of my life by choice or because of circumstances I did not create or cause?
• What is my first gut feeling when I think of this person?  Is it negative or positive?
• Is this person controlling me?  
• Am I under bondage to this person?  
• Do I feel the need to seek this person's approval before making decisions? 
• Am I afraid of this person?
• Is this person Godly?  
• Does this person maintain a close relationship with Jesus and seek to follow Him in their daily life?  
• Should I be listening to and following this person's advice?
• Do I want my life to turn out like theirs?
• How do I feel after being around this person?  
• Does this person fill my cup or drain it?
• Does this person inspire me to press in closer to Christ?
• Do I feel like I can never please this person?
• Does God require me to continue to try to please them?
• Has this person ever hurt me in any way?  
• Do I need to forgive this person? 
• Do I hate this person?
• Do I want God to bless this person?
• Do I have a choice as to whether or not I am around this person?
• Do thoughts of this person bring on anxiety?
• Am I comfortable being around this person?
• Does this person make me feel inferior?
• Is this person in my inner circle?
• Should this person be in my inner circle?  Have they earned the right?
• Does this person remind me a lot of Jesus?
• How does this person feel about Jesus?
• Do I want to be like this person?
• Would I want others to view me like I view this person?
• Do I owe this person an apology?
• Do I owe this person anything?
• Is this a relationship I should gently, but firmly eliminate from my life?
• If so, is this a relationship that I can eliminate from my life?
• If not, what changes can I make to minimize contact and influence without being unlike Christ?
• Do I feel obligated to this person?  Why?
• Would Jesus allow this person to dictate His decisions?
• Would He advise one of His disciples to shake off the dust and move on from this person?

In this post that was recently published on No Sidebar, I identified ten warning signs of a potentially toxic friendship.  The things I talked about could apply to familial and other relationships as well as friendships.

Biblical minimalism is about cleansing and purging the toxins, shedding the excess, minimizing what distracts us from wholeheartedly following and serving Christ.  In closing, here are some Scriptures that will help as you search your soul regarding the relationships you are allowing to be a part of your life, especially the ones in your inner circle.  This is so important to your well-being and to the measure of your success in following Jesus and living a life of peace.

"Do not be deceived: Bad company ruins good morals."  I Corinthians 15:33  (ESV)

"Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?"  2 Corinthians 6:14  (ESV)

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. Be not wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord, and turn away from evil."  Proverbs 3:5-7  (ESV)

Who is in your inner circle?  Whose advice are you listening to? Whose approval do you seek?  Whose feedback are you influenced by?  Whose attitude is affecting yours?  Who are you allowing to sway your thinking and worldview?  Who are your friends?  Of those friends, who are you closest to?

As we continue to follow this path toward living a peace-filled, Godly, minimal, Jesus-honoring life, relationships play a vital role.  Though it is a challenging process to sincerely lay them out before the Lord and seek His will concerning whether or not there is a need for purging in this area, it is an extremely worthy and necessary endeavor.  God bless you as you seek His will and give you the courage to follow Him wholeheartedly.